What I'd Like to Tell Historic Figures

Moses: Go South Boy... there's good land and water in Uganda!

Jesus: Go Away Son, Ya Bother Me!

Mohammed: Have a Drink.. You'll Feel Better... then we can go catch the show at Deja Vu!

Abe Lincoln: You're right about Slavery, but wrong about everything else.

Jeff Davis: You're wrong about Slavery, but right about everything else.

Woodrow Wilson: Hell No... I Won't Go!

Franklin Roosevelt: Are you kidding? You're far more dangerous than General MacArthur and Huey P. Long combined!

Winston Churchill: It is not wise to make a pact with Beezelbub just to fight Satan!

Adolf Hitler: CHILL OUT, DUDE!

Dick Nixon: Just come clean and tell the truth... even Al Capone would have an easy time beating McGovern!

George W. Bush: THINK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO LBJ!!!!!